Dreams, not Dream
Janet Harmon Bragg is not a common household name but most of us can experience the essence of her story.
Mrs. Bragg was born in 1907 in Atlanta and was raised to believe “if Jack can do it, Jill can do it, too.” Mrs. Bragg received a nursing degree from Spelman, moved to Chicago, and became a nursing supervisor and then a health inspector. But, in the then home of Black Aviation (Chicago), Mrs. Bragg yearned to fly.
She did all the right things. She was the first Black woman enrolled in a grounds school of flying, earned two pilots’ licenses and purchased a plan, but was denied entry as a WW II Women’s Auxiliary Service pilot because of her race.
Despite her disappointment, Mrs. Bragg earned a commercial flying license. She denied the opportunity to fly commercially because, at that time, those paid opportunities did not exist for African-American pilots.
All the right credentials and experiences couldn’t get her to make a living soaring through the air. Seemingly, her dream and passion were grounded.
Later, an opportunity arose for Mrs. Bragg to purchase an apartment building that she converted into a recovery home for patients receiving public assistance. Another opportunity came and she went on to provide nursing care in a 22 room mansion that also housed students visiting from Ethiopia.
In 1955, the nurse by trade and the pilot by passion was a three-month personal guest of Ethiopian Emperor Haile Selassie.
While Mrs. Bragg may have dreamed to be in the clouds, her story shows that with coming through disappointment, opportunities and untapped talents can travel and form in emotional and physical places never before imagined. While her physical plane was grounded, Mrs. Bragg allowed other dreams to soar.
Opportunities can bring forth multiples dreams.
In “Dreams,” Langston Hughes wrote:
Hold fast to dreams
For if dreams die
Life is a broken-winged bird
That cannot fly.
Hold fast to dreams
For when dreams go
Life is a barren field
Frozen with snow.
Call our to your DreamS, not Dream. Keep Soaring!
Learn MorePrince: My First Introduction to Social Consciousness, Part I
Summer reminds me of good music and as a delicious start of this week, his Royal Badness had another birthday. Prince Rogers Nelson. Had FanGirl stuff been popular back then, I would have been the official Prince FanGirl, but maybe not since I once read that Prince doesn’t like fans because it stands for fanatic. (He’s so amazingly and wonderfully complicated! ) Sorry Prince, I have been and will always be fanatic over what you represent to me.
The magical joy of getting an album, taking the disk out of the paper or plastic sleeve and putting it on the record player, then listening to new music over and over again while staring at the album cover. His soul seemed to seep in and the lyrics played like a movie. The scenery is set and there is bated breath waiting for the crescendo and denouement.
He has many songs that eventually help shape my social views. Prince has become one of my reasons for becoming a social worker.
Learn MoreDepression
I’ve struggled for weeks trying to type the right message to post about depression. I feared being too clinical, too preachy or too whimsical. This deeply personal video perfectly conveys the symptoms and struggles of depression. You may become slightly uncomfortable at 12:46; please hang in there. The insight is too important to miss.
Wishing you Peace and Prosperity.
Learn MoreShow Yourself
Scrolling through my Notes app deleting unwanted listings, I came across this : “What makes you vulnerable makes you beautiful.” I had NO IDEA where it came from or why I wrote it. I conducted a quick Google search and two blog authors have used the title, Jennifer Barley and Melissa Matthewson. Forgive me. I didn’t read the posts because I had this idea came to my mind and I didn’t want to lose my thoughts.
Vulnerability leads to beauty. It’s like the fragility of a rose; it’s vulnerability to harsh touch makes it beautiful. Roses require a gentle touch. Vulnerability and a gentle touch is required in truly, deeply respectful relationships. We need to show our fragility to our loved one to make beauty rise. When we are harsh with words, deed and lack of understanding, we erode the gloss from each other causing the other person to grow harsh in their words, deeds and understanding.
Be brave, shine through and create roses for each other.
Learn MoreI Don’t Have Time
Colleague circles say the same things about clients wanting appointments. Something similar to, “They will come when they are ready to make the sacrifice to put themselves first.” I agree and I recognize putting yourself first is sometimes hard to do when you already feel you don’t have time.
There’s a tiny twinge of remorse, guilt, whatever it is, on me changing my schedule that will change my availability to folks who are ready for therapy. How do everyday people with jobs and commitments make time to see a therapist who doesn’t offer many evening and weekend appointments?
Give it a Try
Pretend it’s the day after Labor Day, okay? The time of year that always excites me.
The crisp air on the walk to the first day of school. It could be hotter than the fourth of July, but for some reason when school started, the air released its humidity and instead of a hurried, stifling rush, the walk turned into a saunter. The night before would bring those nervous butterflies filled with anticipation and excitement and unanswered questions that the following school months would answer. Who am I? Will I pass? Will I make new friends? Will people like me? What time is lunch?
Times have changed and numerous schools open the week before Labor Day. Times have changed to change the date, but the butterflies and questions somewhat remain the same. Who am I? Do I feel successful in the way I define success? Am I taking care of myself? How will I stay connected with my friends and colleagues? Am I doing my best? And the final question on the list – When will I eat lunch?
Learn MoreFunerals are for the Living
One of my most treasured relatives tells me that funerals are for the living. Funerals are for a time to remember and support and a way of showing the living that there is a reason to live. Depending on your religious or non-religious affiliation, there is an after-life or the body just ceases to exist; either way, the departed has moved on. The living is left with struggle, disappointment, pain, hurt, surprise, despair and sometimes eventually peace.
Given the news of Robin Williams’s death, it would make sense for me to use this space as an homage to all of the celebrities and “notables” who were tortured souls dealing with mental illness and/or substance abuse. I could talk about all of the talent, the feelings of inadequacy some of them may have felt, masking pain and living out-of-step with healthy mental well-being. But, I will leave that to all of the experts and all of the newsanchors who “are trying to make sense of it all.”
Instead, I’d like to focus on the suffering souls of the loved ones who suffer with the tortured. Those who stay up all night with worry, those who wonder if today is the day my loved one will truly self-destruct, those who feel inadequate because their love isn’t enough.
What I have to say to you is simply, do your best and STILL take care of yourself. Deal with your own sadness and anxiety by reaching out to people outside of the tortured soul.
Many years ago, I read The Suicidal Mind by Edwin S. Shneidman and the book echoed what I had been trained to know about the folks in pain. Folks in despair own it and vacuous depths of their pain is often held in secret. My job is to try to show alternatives, give support and resources and ultimately use and believe in hope when the tortured can’t see any signs of hope. Ultimately what I know is that their pain is not about me which gives me the freedom to know that I am a stop on the journey; I am not solely responsible for the journey.
This is my hope for those living in torture, with the tortured. Share your love and compassion everyday, keep hope in your heart, appreciate being part of and not responsible for their journey and take care of your sadness by finding support for you.
If you know of someone in need or you need professional support, contact your insurance company for mental health providers in your area, contact the National Alliance for Mental Illness for resources and support groups, ask your primary care physician for resources, and step up your courage to ask to friends and associates for suggestions on where to go for help. I know people fear stigma, but that is coming from a place of shame and when used negatively, shame can only breed more pain.
Learn MoreFunerals are for the Living
One of my most treasured relatives tells me that funerals are for the living. Funerals are for a time to remember and support and a way of showing the living that there is a reason to live. Depending on your religious or non-religious affiliation, there is an after-life or the body just ceases to exist; either way, the departed has moved on. The living is left with struggle, disappointment, pain, hurt, surprise, despair and sometimes eventually peace.
Given the news of Robin Williams’s death, it would make sense for me to use this space as an homage to all of the celebrities and “notables” who were tortured souls dealing with mental illness and/or substance abuse. I could talk about all of the talent, the feelings of inadequacy some of them may have felt, masking pain and living out-of-step with healthy mental well-being. But, I will leave that to all of the experts and all of the newsanchors who “are trying to make sense of it all.”
Instead, I’d like to focus on the suffering souls of the loved ones who suffer with the tortured. Those who stay up all night with worry, those who wonder if today is the day my loved one will truly self-destruct, those who feel inadequate because their love isn’t enough.
What I have to say to you is simply, do your best and STILL take care of yourself. Deal with your own sadness and anxiety by reaching out to people outside of the tortured soul.
Many years ago, I read The Suicidal Mind by Edwin S. Shneidman and the book echoed what I had been trained to know about the folks in pain. Folks in despair own it and vacuous depths of their pain is often held in secret. My job is to try to show alternatives, give support and resources and ultimately use and believe in hope when the tortured can’t see any signs of hope. Ultimately what I know is that their pain is not about me which gives me the freedom to know that I am a stop on the journey; I am not solely responsible for the journey.
This is my hope for those living in torture, with the tortured. Share your love and compassion everyday, keep hope in your heart, appreciate being part of and not responsible for their journey and take care of your sadness by finding support for you.
If you know of someone in need or you need professional support, contact your insurance company for mental health providers in your area, contact the National Alliance for Mental Illness for resources and support groups, ask your primary care physician for resources, and step up your courage to ask to friends and associates for suggestions on where to go for help. I know people fear stigma, but that is coming from a place of shame and when used negatively, shame can only breed more pain.
Learn More